The Words That Carry Me

Inspired by this month’s family letter exchange

Every month, my mother, sisters, and I pick a topic and each write a letter to share with the others. It’s a way for us to stay connected, reflect, and learn more about each other—no matter how busy life gets.

This month’s topic was: What is your favorite quote or poem?

Everyone has words that stick with them—lines from a poem, a quote in a book, a prayer whispered in tough times. These aren’t just words to me. They’ve become my anchors, my reminders, and my quiet sources of strength. As I sat down to write my letter, I realized the words I hold close are too meaningful not to share more widely. So I decided to post them here on my blog, too.

(And yes, I sent this to my family!)

A Poem That Built a Foundation

I first read Seamus Heaney’s Scaffolding in a British Literature class during my sophomore year of college. I couldn’t tell you why it stuck with me then—but it did. Years later, I gave Ray a copy of it tucked into a Valentine’s Day card. It felt right.

Heaney wrote the poem for his wife during a disagreement. It’s short and simple, but carries a powerful message: even when things feel uncertain or disconnected, if the foundation is strong, you’ll be okay. That idea has always stayed with me—not just in relationships, but in how I view myself.

You can let the scaffolding fall. What matters is the strength of the wall you’ve built underneath. It’s a quiet kind of confidence I try to carry with me.

Scaffolding
Masons, when they start upon a building,
Are careful to test out the scaffolding;
Make sure that planks won’t slip at busy points,
Secure all ladders, tighten bolted joints.
And yet all this comes down when the job’s done
Showing off walls of sure and solid stone.
So if, my dear, there sometimes seem to be
Old bridges breaking between you and me
Never fear. We may let the scaffolds fall
Confident that we have built our wall.

— Seamus Heaney

A Quote That Reminds Me Who I Am

There’s a quote I found once in a book that stopped me in my tracks. I had to look it up and read the full version. It’s by Albert Camus, and it still gives me goosebumps:

“In the midst of hate, I found there was, within me, an invincible love.
In the midst of tears, I found there was, within me, an invincible smile.
In the midst of chaos, I found there was, within me, an invincible calm.
I realized, through it all, that…
In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer.”

“And that makes me happy. For it says that no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger – something better, pushing right back.”

That quote is a reminder of what lives inside each of us. We’re stronger than we think. The hard seasons don’t define us—we do. And even in the coldest winters, there’s still summer inside us, waiting.

A Mantra for the Tough Days

When I’m dragging my feet on a task or facing a to-do list that I’d rather ignore, I chant this to myself (sometimes out loud):

Action creates motivation.

It’s my kickstart. Instead of waiting to “feel” ready or motivated, I just start. One small step leads to the next. I’ve learned that movement—any movement—breeds momentum. And momentum gets things done.

A Prayer That Grounds Me

There’s one more piece I have to include, even though it wasn’t originally on this list. It’s the Serenity Prayer—something I learned through Al-Anon and something that has truly saved me more times than I can count.

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.

I’ve said that prayer—quietly, tearfully, desperately—more than ten million times. It’s my reminder that the only thing I can control is myself. And sometimes, that’s the most powerful kind of control there is.

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These are the words I come back to when life gets messy, uncertain, or hard. They’re not magic spells, but they are small truths that help me find my way back to myself. And for that, I’ll always be grateful.